This year, the new year hit me hard for some reason. I felt this great amount of pressure on myself to have 2018 figured out. To have it all planned out, personally and professionally. So naturally, I went to Target, shopped the planners, got new pens and starting planning... what I told myself would be a grand 2018!
But then I found myself getting into that comparison cycle over and over again... "oh my goodness, I need to have all of my events in order, I need to have some BIG intentions set for the new year and I need to share my intentions with the world! She's sharing them... do I need to do that too?!" and on... and on... We're two weeks in and you can imagine how that ended.
Listen, I LOVE the new year! I love the energy that everyone emits. It's this lightness of new beginnings, freshness and ease after the holidays. It's a time to reflect and a time to honor the growth that happened over the past year. The yoga studios are booming and classes are full of breath - we see it every year and I LOVE it!
So why was I taking myself so seriously this time around? The only thing I can seem to nail down is that when life feels out of control, I seek out control. And this was my control... so I thought. Little did I know though, I wasn't being of service to myself, caring for myself or my family and certainly not LOVING myself (which is my intention this year). I was actually driving myself (and my sweet husband) crazy.
So I let go.
And am still letting go (because I'm not perfect and this is a constant practice). I am choosing to step away from my own inner pressures to plan an elaborate 2018 and am working to surrender into trust. Trust that my own efforts, energy and path is just how it's meant to be. And if I mess up? I'll try again. And if I fall? I'll pick myself back up again. THAT I can control.
Cheers to 2018 - you're a BOLD ONE alright!